Trauma

I pull the trigger, I set the mine

I launch the missile, then I dine

all these things, I do so well

It makes my soul, more fit for hell

I blow the bridge, when convoys cross

who lives or dies, I am the boss

all these things, I do so well

It makes my soul, more fit for hell

I am a spy, it’s do or die

I always cheat, I always lie

all these things, I do so well

It makes my soul, more fit for hell

I fix the plane, that takes the bomb

the pilots die, but I go on

all these things, I do so well

It makes my soul, more fit for hell

I am a soldier, on the ground

I load the mortar, another round

all these things, I do so well

It makes my soul, more fit for hell

Aboard I fire, the ships big gun

I never see, the death I’ve won

all these things, I do so well

It makes my soul, more fit for hell

I drive a tank, that’s full of woe

it’s death I reap, death I sow

all these things, I do so well

It makes my soul, more fit for hell

I am a pilot, I fly the plane

I hit the target, that’s my shame

all these things, I do so well

It makes my soul, more fit for hell

I load the bullets, then I shoot

I step on corpses, with my boot

all these things, I do so well

It makes my soul, more fit for hell

It is a war, really a rout

the body parts, lie all about

all these things, I do so well

It makes my soul, more fit for hell

I am alive, others dead

I point my gun, to my own head

all these things, I do so well

It makes my soul, more fit for hell

It is not suicide that causes you to be in hell.

It is the hell you are in, that causes suicide.

All those who experience war are injured. The things you saw, the things you did, the things you did not do, the things others did - - - all affect you forever. There is no such thing as closure. Some can never bring themselves to talk about it. Some like me can only talk about it with bitterness and after many years. The lucky ones are those who can let those feelings and emotions have the life they deserve. Meanwhile you live in your own private hell. A hell you cannot escape.